Living with a manic depressive girlfriend Videos

Thanks for this recording !

I feel bad for those affected by this disorder but with all due respect people with mental illness are not competent to maintain a healthy relationship and it's not fair to expect the healthy partner to tolerate days, weeks, years of abuse. I'm sorry but I disagree with this video 100%. If you are dating or married to somebody with bipolar and/or borderline disorder do yourself a favor and move on. It rarely if ever improves. Don't waste your life away.

go kill yourself

My husband has bipolar and he left the home over a month ago and my in laws are keeping him away and there not helping him get treatment. He has not had treatment over 4 years it was not until he was gone I realized that his bipolar has come back. I want him to come back but he not answering phone call emails it's like he's in hiding and my inlaws are covering up for him when do they usually come down from the manic state

Not their fault. Aren't we all responsible for our own behaviour. P l e a s e.............and you are saying that they should not leave because they will make them feel worse. Sweet divine. WHAT ABOUT THE PERSON WHO WISHES TO LEAVE BECAUSE OF THE FACT THAT THEY ARE UNHAPPY. Maybe that could effect their mental health. Maybe they feel abandoned by the person they married and think, hold on, SO I have to be the responsible, staple, balanced one 24/7 and feel sorry for the person with Bi polar. WE ALL HAVE MENTAL HEALTH, ALL. You go on telling them to leave if they do not accept their Bi Polar.. lol.. What if the person they are with has a mental health problem??? what if they feel worse because of being abandoned. We are ALL responsible for our own behaviour.

Now...that don't seem right. So you're saying as the partner to a bi-polar individual that it is cruel to leave, that you are abandoning an ill person, BUT, it's okay for the bi-polar person to walk out if the non-afflicted person can't cope and seems to "make things worse." That right there is some bi-polar propaganda bullshit. 21 years I have lived and suffered the turmoil that comes from being in love with a text book bi-polar husband, and I can honestly say it is the most selfish illness there is. I've dealt with ups and downs, depressions, anger, paranoia, medications, therapists, and let me say its ALWAYS all about him. His needs, his wants, his support....it's a freaking drain on the un-inflicted partner. 21 years of catering to the mentally ill at the cost of my own feelings, needs, emotions, and he just takes and takes, and then takes some more. It is unfair to suggest that because after 20 years of coping that I'm being cruel for wanting to run far far away. What is cruel is the bi-polar partner using their illness as an excuse or a crutch to justify their emotional cruelty. I'm as sympathetic and compassionate a person as ever was, but I'm not stupid, I did the research, read the books, joined the support groups, went to therapy with him, and have even on occasion counted pills to keep track. There is only so much that a wife can do. It's irresponsible for you to even suggest that it is a "normal" spouses duty to make sure they don't feel abandoned. There is a line that can be crossed and on the other side of that line is this....they have the ability to hold themselves accountable for refusing treatment, messing about with their medications, and being emotionally abusive. There is nothing written that says the un-inflicted spouse must sacrifice their own well-being and sanity to make the ill one happy. I've done everything that is physically possible to maintain and keep him healthy, but the real questions is this...what has he done for me in this situation, better yet, what has he done for himself? I came to this video looking for more help and new insights and honestly what I found was another bit of bi-polar self-serving bullshit. I love my husband (more than he deserves) but reality is a bitch and the reality is that the more one caters too these ups and downs, the easier it is for them to manipulate your emotions with a form of emotional Nazism and then blame it on you. I know it's an awful illness, and it's terribly painful to watch, here's the question I posed to my husband to which he had no answer....why would you want to wallow in your pain when it takes just as much effort to fight against it? Here's the thing, he isn't stupid and on a lot of levels he knows what he's doing. And because of that, after 20 years I'm ready to "abandon" him to his own devices and that's not called abandonment, that's called self-preservation.

When i met my spouse, she was only 21. We had a wonderful and very loving relationship. When we had our Son, ... she became severely depressed. I couldn't figure out why when life seemed to be moving in a great direction. She was dead set on moving back to her home town around her family as if that would make everything better. When she finally convinced me to do so, upon arriving there is when everything became horrible. She in a sense emotionally abandoned me and her son. She still was very depressed and turned her reasons for why she was feeling this way towards me. "it must be him" she would say to her mother who would agree with her. After months of her being completely selfish, self centered, wouldn't come home after work to be with friends, ... she cheated on me for over a month.. I left her before i found out about that though because I had enough of her not coming home. I would accuse her of cheating or just having her priorities out of order. I did take my son and she didn't seem to care, she just said go away. Well, after a week she called me threatening to kill herself if I didn't let her come see her son. But I never said she couldn't... Anyhow, she comes, she tries jumping out of the car 3 times going 70 MPH and if it weren't for my strength of pulling her back in by her arm the first time, her hair the 2nd time and her shirt the third time she would have died. I took her straight to the ER, and she was committed. couple weeks later shes diagnosed with BP 1 and is now on meds and staying with me for the time being. The problem is, is that she seems to only be a shell of who i once knew. She is so ashamed of what she has done and wants to be with me and her son but doesn't seem able to show any compassion or affection most of the time. I myself am struggling with my feelings with her and I personally didn't sign up for this. But I do get her all the help she needs. Therapy daily, Psychiatrist weekly , medicine, and a place for her to live with her son.. the problem is I need reasons to stay with her and she is unable to provide me with any thus far. its been almost 2 months since she arrived here from her home town. She quite literally ruined our lives and is now still acting like I owe it to her to like and love her.. which i am willing to do but she doesn't really show me much in return for my emotions, time and resources spent on her. I am being told to give her time to stable out but If I had known she was bipolar from the start, I would have never gone this far with her.. I feel stuck. I would definitely give this a chance and start over but she is still not really all there. what should I do because I am running out of steam.. the effort just to be with her grows exponentially by the day and she seems to just want to do the bare minimum. yes she takes her meds, yes she goes to therapy, but is that enough?? should I just excuse all of her past horrible mistakes because a Dr. gave her a diagnosed excuse ???? I mean Bipolar people live in the same reality as people without it and we don't just get to hit the restart button when we fuck up.. We have to earn our place in the world and earn our spouses love, earn our positions at work and earn our friends friendship... why should she be able to just Exist and I have to be alright with that... I need advice.. I myself am in therapy and my therapist put me on an antidepressant. I work out twice a day sometimes and I still hurt over what she has done to my son and I. will my wife ever become the woman I fell in love with? or am I doomed to be with this Zombie like version of her who takes takes takes takes takes and never gives anything back..

What about if you're with someone who has all the symptoms of being bi polar but they refuse to look into it or get help. They refuse to change and keep blaming you for everything when in reality its caused because they cant control their anger. The bi polar person doesn't want to change and in return they just make your life a living hell. Is it ok to leave then?

What a sweet lady! I wish all our partners would think and see this with the same compassion that you tell us about :)