Vlog on signs you've been abused by a Narcissist, utilizing therapeutic tools such as Behavioral Chain Analysis & reflecting on the sequence of events. Breaking ...
I have a narc mother Mandrake, the sleeping with your mother instead of
your spouse is indicative of toxic bonding. The mother likely made her fear
for her life is she loved anyone other than her in early childhood, and so
its transposed into adulthood. My mother would get very hostile with me for
any love interests I had, she never wanted me to love anyone but her. Its
like the role of mother and daughter are reversed. You become their mother,
not the other way around. Its like they expect you to have their
relationship proceed anything and they trash everyone around them. I am
suffering, but at least I left this golden child status behind me. Still
reeling from the after effects of the toxic bond.
+Warrior Bushido No problem, glad to have helped you. I must say your videos are eye opening. My mother used to get me to break peoples hearts in my teens and enjoyed seeing the fallout. Nothing you could have done. She is possessed and convinced that everyone is the problem except the mother, while the inverse is true. Your videos give me a different angle to the situation as I am sorry to say that I was once a pawn in a similar game. I was only a teenager though so I cut myself some slack.
+Warrior Bushido I still have issues with intimacy. I hope they will wear off. I am conditioned to believe that people resemble her. Being with her mother is a comfort zone. Her mother has infantalized her to the point of no return. It is hard to break away, takes many situations where you confirm that not everyone is the same. These kinds of mothers turn their young against men because they are jealous of daughters actually receiving love. So they want to possess the daughter and to convince her that men are scum and to be used.
+Warrior Bushido Wow... Straight from the mouth of someone who's been there. Thank you is not enough. This is an older video, but even just... Going back to the memory, my heart is pounding slightly. It was just so... Weird. Strange... The whole thing is so f***king strange - the confusion... I got notification the a consent for divorce decree was entered, which means I'll be separated from these people forever soon. They'll try and screw me financially but... I'll NEVER have to feel this way again. Sleeping on the couch while your wife is in your bedroom with her mother at 23.... Jesus.Thank you again. Better than anything I've read on the topic. I hope your suffering eases my friend...
How does someone smoke pot and NOT get in touch with her more empathic
self? Did she not smoke often enough? Whenever I blazed up, I would have
the most profound of personal revelation and introspection! WTF? What about
psilocybin mushrooms? I've heard tell that repeated consumption improves
one's personality.
+QuartuvLarry She's a chronic user - but that's not the issue really. She's diagnosed BiPolar I w/ Psychotic Features, and my psych doc thinks, based on how she's behaved, that she's Borderline & on the narcissistic spectrum. He said he can medicate the BiPolar, the psychotic features - but personality disorder takes introspection, hard work and something special to really conquer. I thought she had that in her, but she repeatedly showed me that she can't. Even to this day in the divorce dealings, but that's just another story.
THERE IS TWO SIDES TO EVERY STORY....i can see right thru ur act...u were
not the only victim....i really wonder what her side is...HONESTLY you have
a problem with her relationship with her mother?! Wtf is wrong with u
+Nerdy Nett Stating the obvious, there is two sides to the story - so, getting upset that you only see one side of it here and calling this video an 'act' - not sure what point you're trying to make with this. I have a problem that her mother isn't taking care of her 10-year diagnosed serious mental illness which came up in marriage. So yes, I am bitter that her relationship with her mother was a major obstacle in recovery/stabilization for her. Throughout the video I speak on the things I did wrong as well, so of course I don't think I'm the 'only victim'. I am however, the only one working on myself.Sounds like maybe you've had a history with a bad relationship and am seeing the other guy in what I'm saying here. If that's true, sorry about that. This is why I've moved away from personal information, because there's just no way to explain the situation entirely.
THERE IS TWO SIDES TO EVERY STORY....i can see right thru ur act...u were
not the only victim....i really wonder what her side is...HONESTLY you have
a problem with her relationship with her mother?! Wtf is wrong with u
Have you read Pete Walker on the 4 Fs and CPTSD you really should I never really looked into NPD and I really believe I have CPTSD due to mother NPD lack of Father figure Ex wife BPD/NPD and since I never looked into emotional issues I let my walls down after a year split with my now wife. The first time U never allowed my walls down. Until this year. I think I have been in one constant Flashback starting around March Its been hell brother
+Goraiders75 Happy to oblige, you make good points and I wouldn't want to keep that from anyone. Hopefully blocking her was enough, also edited my response to not 'feed the troll' so to speak. Also a bit ashamed of my reaction anyhow.
+Goraiders75 You're right. I should probably delete this thread and block this person. I don't like censoring people, but you're right. I fear the paranoia that goes with waking up to narcissism so I'm always remiss to dub someone a narc... but I think you're right. Sorry for the misunderstanding before here, and thank you for the wisdom.
+Homunculus Mandrake cuz there are NARCS that read and watch videos and in order tO GET ANY type of narc supply they will do anything even make stupid comments good luck in court and always remember we are worth more then we feel\think about ourselfs and we are way less evil and violent and vendictive then what the Narc portrays us to be :)
+Goraiders75 I see what you're saying. I tried replying to you both but figured replying to you both would be notified, and everything save for the part about the lack of truth/3 sides was in response was directed to the OP.Thank you for clarifying your point, particularly in a calm manner, as I wasn't able to tell if someone was jumping on that bandwagon of I'm an act - which was extremely hurtful. Apologies if that seemed towards you, I'm absolutely fried waiting for this divorce to be over.I am certainly not in a good place and am reactive - having to hear her voice after what will be nearly 4 months of silence soon is going to be hell. Nerdy Nett is not the first female to attack me, and I still don't get why this is the case.
+Homunculus Mandrake i do not believe for one second you were acting let me clarify What I mean is in a situation every individual due to past events upbringing and so on develop filters on all 5 sences so say me and you and a hidden video tape were at the grocery store and say it got robbed well what I seen heard smelled felt and tasted would be different then yours and the only one that would be spot on is the hidden video tape AKA "truth" sorry I dont mean to cause negativity or disbelief. now in the case of NPD what they "recall" would be way off base of the camera where mine and your story would closely resemble the camera. Hope this clarifies my intentions.
+Goraiders75 I don't suppose the original comment is at all interested in the black and white droves of proof, or the diagnoses from psychiatrists - or the in-absentia remarks from our marriage counselor who was on her side up until she left once I showed her the things I found out about her - about being a sociopath.You know, enjoying torturing people. Hurting people, getting off on it. Things that a sociopathic narcissist does, or a narcopath.None of this matters in a no-fault divorce state, so I am money fucked. I'm not sure if this attitude comes from a 'men don't get abused' mentality - but it's complete bullshit.
Hi AoC!
I'm looking for the term you used: "A trigger or causal factor of certain
behaviour"?
There is a website that I'm contributing to... you will be mentioned!
+1
Antecedent!!!lol...Its hard to not use expletives in describing how utterly wonderful and amazing you are AoC! Thank You!My site is nowhere near done yet, though feel free to take a gander :) antisocial.suspectsociety.orgAs I said you will be mentioned!GL on 1000k Subscribers, its coming soon!
+Oliver revilO Antecedent or precursor? It can also be referred to as discriminative stimulus (behavior science terminology).
Red Flag of a Narcissist #44: Huge Hypocrite
This is Red Flag #44 in the "Red Flags of a Narcissist" series: Huge Hypocrite! Narcissistic people are selfish and entitled. They truly believe that they should be ...
+Kitty Ponce There are two main theories out there: nature and nurture. That the Narcissist either didn't receive enough love, or was spoiled rotten--and/or that there is something "off" with their brain chemistry. Either way, these people have problems that we can't fix--and it's not healthy for us to stick around and try. All we can do is to wish them light and love...from a place where we know that we are able to be safe and sane. For those of you who are deeply compassionate beings, please do not sink yourself to save someone else. <3
+zinat quazi Understanding helps defuse a lot of hurt. Keep searching the internet and watching videos on NPD, take what you want, get general ideas. It is my understanding the person with NPD fears intimacy and rejection so they set it up where they leave you if you are getting too close (see Sam Vaknun videos). The fact you are crushed is more Narcissistic supply for the person with the shame based personality disorder and helps him leave. The fact you would want him when he treats you bad is just another reason to devalue you, have less respect or desire for you. This is a double edged sword, he needs pats on the back but if you give them to him, especially too much, too ready to please, then he looses all respect and has disdain for you. There are few times that the NPD actually has the ability to reason and have a relationship but he knows how to play like he does in order to manipulate or when he is feeling magnanimous or generous, when things are going his way. He simply cannot afford real intimacy, it is not about you, put your ego aside. Around a person with NPD you cannot have expectations, if you do you are in trouble. Part of the time they get their much needed feelings of grandiosity from putting down others. If you are feeling hurt you are feeding him. If you encounter him, don't engage him, quickly and politely dismiss yourself from his area- quickly, without engaging him. he is an ex.. Just like married men should be off limits, so should your partner that left you. Examine your behavior for future relationships, get counseling on how to stay in contact with your own self worth and how to fight fair etc. If you have identified many Narcissitic traits in another person, realize there is often lack of reason, lack of rationality, extremes, and mostly that IT IS ABOUT HIM, not about you, except you are picking the person and staying. Get counseling. Find a counselor that is actually helping you and listen to your gut. In the future if he needs more Narcissistic supply he may come back where he found it before, remember this is conditional. Watch everything you can on the internet and YouTube with an understanding heart. Ask yourself what it is about you that cannot accept your ex has a shame based personality disorder and that you have to make it about you and your ego instead. What looked like love in the very beginning never was. Also remember he has a right to what he thinks and feels, everyone does. Honor his feelings and wishes and go out and find happiness in life. If you cannot be happy, find joy in life, at anytime without a partner you need to do some exploration. Connection with a higher power can replace the ego of self, ACOA (adult children of alcoholics) and co dependence anonymous meetings can be very helpful.
+zinat quasi hey it can take years to recover from this insidious type of abuse. It feels sad and cold and dark and lonely. Eventually you will realise that all the emptiness you feel is a sense of the loss of parts of yourself that you, without knowing it, allowed the Narc to covet and pretend where his/hers. Believe in yourself again. It requires work and effort. Realise this and begin the journey of self nurturing and reclaiming gently all the joy and delight that was sucked out of you by the narc. You are special and can breath back in your sense of self worth. Anger and saddness will need to be processed. Find a holistic psychologist if you are really floundering and if you just split from a Narc then you certainly deserve the extra support. For some of us it can mean the difference between life and death.
Like this one.
I had avoided the line in the sand by taking total responsibility for the
context we wound up living in. We chose to live on a farm, to support our
large animals the thing we had most in common. He said we had to grow the
feed and therefore purchase the equipment for him to drive or get rid of
the critters that contributed to my reluctance to leave.
I worked the land did all the physical walking and isolated myself until I
went to church - the great rebellion as I began to understand it was viewed.
The line in the sand was based on the health of the animals and all hell
broke out when I challenged his understanding of the handling of their
care. It made no difference to his life but he opposed a change even in the
face of advice from people we hired to help with their maintenance. I took
a stand for the health of the horses and suddenly I was the bad guy. yuk
He was always right and I was not. Not true in fact but in his eyes
+DAnna Clark DillonHard lesson for you and the animals. Run or die might be a good saying for everyone in your situation. He might not have consciously known it, but it sounds like he was telling you what to do, run away or get run over. If he kills the animals trying to teach them a lesson in order to "keep them safe" then he did not succeed (in keeping them safe) and did not make a wise choice of teaching method or wise choice in manner to keep them safe. It is my understanding you are saying essentially this and realize the absurdity of what he did. Sounds like a miserable situation to be around. I am wisihng for you good things, wise and kind friends.
Hi that is a great analysis - the critters where the illustrations of his treatment.He taught dogs and cats to stay away for the vehicles by driving at them fast. They learned to run or die. A behavior that proved his point even in the face of my objections. He said I was being ridiculous and didn't care about their safety.
+DAnna Clark Dillon It is true that they have to be right, cannot be wrong (they are all knowing, grandiose) , but I also think just the act of being challenged or not getting what they want can be so threatening to a person with a shame based personality disorder that they can go into a rage, I call it an adult temper tantrum. It is very hard to reason with someone that cannot afford, emotionally, to be wrong or to shift their thinking. Some people say they handled it by making everything his/her idea. This is not a life and cannot be maintained in all situations, as you point out.. I miss being able to have rational calm discussions with the NPD and hate being afraid that simply my expression of my beliefs may lead to a blow up. I think your realization would have had to come sooner or later. Personally, I want to learn how to spot these people earlier, and will adjust my commitment, expectations, and reactions accordingly in the future. I want to be able to say calmly, to anyone, that I find their behavior of XYZ hurtful, threatening, unacceptable, irrational, etc. and be OK with my life as I see fit. When actions are driven by self focus the person cannot and will not always make a rational or responsible decision. To realize the partner you have paired with for support and mutual growth just may not be able to be supportive of you any more than he was for the horses has to be a little disconcerting. This mental and/or physical illness is so well disguised it can take fighting for someone or something else to realize something is really wrong here.
This is my life. I have said it before and will say it again, this is the
biggest biggest red flag. I have been shamed for years for my sexual past
even though he has a history of more sexual partners than me. It goes
without saying that I could not go out or hang out but he can, I could
never have a fb account but he has had one for 10 yrs then i find out hes
being shady on there and I am supposed to get over it. Its the past. Even
boils down to the kids. I get off at 11 pm but it was always expected to
get up to bring them to school even when he didnt have a job and do
homework and baths while he did nothing. Been gone 10 weeks and hes still
asking me to forgive and forget and he can fix himself without therapy.
+Neicole M If he's not willing to live a life of honesty and transparency, then there is no relationship--there is you clinging to hope that he will change, and him running the streets doing whatever he wants to do and then hiding it.
+Neicole M It's impossible to have anything other than a healthy relationship with someone who has no true accountability for their actions, and who doesn't value others. I'm sure he thinks he can fix himself without therapy, but will he is the real question. Manipulative people tend to think they can do anything, but their actions always show otherwise. (((hugs))) to you.
The things hes done to me and the way hes humiliated me and disrespected me he would never tolerate if reversed. I cannot have conversation with men without having to explain every detail. He used to require that I let him go through my phone but never could I his. He leaves for hours without being accountable but im gone for 4 min too long hes calling. I pay every bill while he provides groceries and thats it. But of course he says all this will change. He will give more money and spend more time with his oh so important family. But not important enough to go to therapy.
OMG. SO TRUE!!!!!!!! Frustrated me to no end, until I just had to let it
go. There's no explaining things to a narcissist. Their reality is rarely
reality. I've learned so much watching your channel (and Beverly Banov
Brown's channel, too). Thank you!!
+Narcissist Support That is the most fitting phrase in the history of fitting phrases - crazy makers. It took me months to unravel my mind back and understand what happened. It's like you can't see it until you get some space to think again! Lol.
Will your kids just not sit still for photos? Check out this short video to learn to shoot them like a pro //bit.ly/1PDkrcx Watch more Mood and Personality ...
I worked worked with a lady in Debenhams and not saying her name she was a
very nice lady but she has a type of mood disorder I would not place her as
a Narcissistic but an Histrionics' Personality, she can over too me and
said "are prices Richard are much different in the dorma department in
Exeter don't interfere darling" I done it again and she came over too the
till and said to a customer "His new here and don't work for dorma" the
tills went wrong and she asked me for help and then she told me and the
customer "we have idiots in the Debenhams department today looks like"
would you say she is Histrionic ?
Richard
Exeter UK
Desensitization Tactics of Domestic Abuse / Narcissistic Abuse
Desensitization is a tactic the abuser uses to get the victim used to the abuse. Little by little they filter it into the relationship and make the victim feel that it is their ...
I have been trying to kind of "map" my experience with these things from
the inside out, to get a handle on what happened in my life, and hearing it
all here helps so much. This is very clarifying. Looking back I can see the
subtle training that I received and complied with for years before it
crossed over a boundary that set off alarm bells for me (finally). Thank
you.
+Lisa C It is good to map your experience from the inside out. This is the best way to begin to understand what happened. Thank you for sharing and for taking the time to comment. Annie - gentlekindnesscoaching.com / Coaching to Overcome Narcissistic Abuse
+Fernando Hacil I am not quite sure how the PM works but you can reach me through my web site ... gentlekindnesscoaching.com There is a way to send me a message there that goes to my email alerts. Thank you for watching and commenting. I look forward to hearing from you at the gentle kindness coaching siteWishing you peace of mind,Blessings,Annie gentlekindnesscoaching.com
WOW!!! SPOT ON!!!! Great video, very cathartic to hear this. Makes you
realize you aren't crazy. 16 years I dealt with this. I can assure you the
scariest combination of relationship is a BPD codependent on a Covert
Narcissist. Add children into the mix and you have a bad remake of the
Titanic.
+Damon Lenahan BPD Codependent and a Covert Narcissist makes for chaos and pain. I sympathize with you. Thank you for watching and taking the time to comment. I appreciate your support.Blessings,Annie gentlekindnesscoaching.com
Awesome video! Much more realistic description of maintaining abuse by
mixing continuous intermittent devaluing and idealization. In later stages
target is so much in fight or flight that it becomes the only state they're
ever in. Even in absence of abuser and feeling drawn to them despite. It is
all so callous, so calculated, and so consciously done, that the talk of
'poor narcissist/psychopath abused as child unaware of their wrongdoings'
on some coaches' blogs and website just irritates me so much and misleads
the targets so much and props them up for more abuse. You're for REAL. It's
so evident who really had this kind of experience and who's just
racketeering.. Thank you for putting this out.
+Be The Light Your words touch my heart. Thank you so much for being genuine and real. When we have been through abuse from narcissists we are used to abusers being fake and not Real. It becomes important to connect with people are Real and down to earth.I am glad the videos are helping. People need to feel validated. I agree with you about the online people that act like the "Poor narcissists" cannot help how they are. If they were abused as children and we were abused as children...then aren't they capable just like we are...of making a different choice than ending up just like their parents?We did not want to be like out parents because we saw how that hurts people. The narcissist is also aware of how abuse hurts people. They are choosing to be the same way as their parents. They are adults and they are making that choice to be abusive.Wishing you peace,Annie gentlekindnesscoaching.com
Narcissism: Using Money For Control, Power, and Enslavement - By Sam Vaknin
Narcissism: Using Money For Control, Power, and Enslavement - By Sam Vaknin Watch this compelling video to protect yourself from narcissistic behavior and ...
The definition of Narcissism is often incorrect, and also often very confusing.
Subscribe to "Daylight Out Of Darkness" to see more of my videos link: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC9froCZivpmO7ayjhqTWSpQ Link below to Daylight ...
You're amazing, thank you so much for your videos. They have sincerely
helped me understand what I've been through. Recovering from narc abuse can
be soooooo isolating, especially if someone has never been with a
narcissist, they can't begin to imagine what we have been through.
+Gatekeepers Heart .... true forget about the newage or religion... that's irrelivent. However Jessica Schwab who lived with Teal in her house of followers suffered a great deal there and describes it in detail in a 5-hour video on Jessica's site. Narcissists are so clever... Still I agree always take what you like.. Swan makes excellent points.... Study her carefully though, and as a survivior of narcissists you will surely see familiar traits.
+talksolot well, my name was given to me by my x-brother in law when he was in a raging fit. For some reason I thought it was funny and kept it. I think I am a very strong person especially now. Once we get all this narc business down to a science, I will probably accept love from the real humans. Very soon we will be able to see who is who clearly.
+zerosister your indoctrination seems to be extreme. look at your username 'zerosister' sounds pretty dismal. of course you can have self respect and self love like any human being. the only thing wrong with you is your warped thinking. you are not less than anyone or incapable of anything. you are made by the same force that made everyone else and the sun shines on all of us equally just as the laws of life respond to all of us equally.
The feeling during recovery are spot on. I can say after two years (since a
tramatic event which involved getting attacked by my narc mother) the cloud
has finally lifted. Two things in particular that have helped me that you
have touched on: 1. stay grounded 2. Observe do not obsorb narc behaviour.
thanks again Richard, Respect man, big thumbs up!
The similarity between Narcissists and CULTS is chilling. "You've been in
a one person cult...." This is absolutely spot on. Even though I've left,
the cult is STILL going on, and watching how brainwashed the other
'members' are is really sad.
+FariahH28 Great observation! I grew up in a Christian commune that was deemed a cult just before we left when I was 11. Before today I hadn't specifically made the connection between that and choosing to be with a controlling NPD as an adult...actually, more than one. But this morning I was with a new therapist and heard myself describing my past and present and afterwards it washed over me that the dynamic is indeed eerily similar. Hearing Richard today say, it's like a one-person cult, totally rings true. Including the ongoing brainwashing you mentioned, which is completely devastating when young children are involved.
I kicked a hippy narc cunt out of my house today. she systematically stabs
at people with the aura that she is somehow superior and more intelligent.
told her i would batter her if she didnt leave. GREAT SUCCESS!
Spartanlifecoach, the way your brain works almost makes me think you have a
tad of ADHD going on up there. :P You rock man!! Funny as hell sometimes
and i enjoy your video's a lot. Thx. :) Btw, I have a light form of autism
and the genes that are responsible for autism are the same genes that
generate AD(H)D. Strange right? So sometimes i totally get the way your
brain works. Hell, if i do an online test on ADD i score a 6. At the age of
13 i told myself to stop thinking and really concentrated on that a lot.
Don't know if that changed something in my upper skull but who knows. Got
diagnosed for autism though and i think that's not a joke because these
kids get teased a lot at school. Btw, I wonder what kind of education
you've had in your childhood. ADHD people can be a bit saddistical as well
but if you are not one of those ive seen vids of you telling you have some
saddistical traits yourself. ;) No offence but it's nice to know a bit more
about your true background.
What if, after ending the narcissistic relationship, you realize that your
only other support (parent and siblings) are possibly even worse
narcissists than your ex. I know the answer: no contact and start to
rebuild foundation, right? BTW, I'm an older adult and please don't tell
me I should be over it by now. We didn't have help like this when I was
younger so I'm just learning - and believe me I tell myself a thousand
times a day how stupid I am/was.
Richard,
When one grows up with Narcissistic parents + family; they do not "invite"
them into their lives; instead it is a weird childhood and upbringing which
usually culminates with a Narc spouse due to the deep
subconscious familiarity with these creatures. Please see the effect on
ANgela for instance.
+Maxwell King aaah ok I get it now. I was closed minded because I disagreed with you saying we don't invite them in - because in fact we don't when we are simply born into that kind of family. And I was! but it took me a while anyway - apologies
+Maxwell King Yes, you are right; when we are born into a narcissistic family unit we are not consenting to anything. At that point in the video I was specifically referring to narcissistically abusive relationships in adulthood. Sorry for not being clearer.
+Maxwell King ok, I will endeavour to ascertain where my mind closed there Maxwell, if it did. Apologies if there was offence, none was intended and the written word can be tricky. I do feel that we do invite the narc, and for the reasons actually that you have mentioned - the conditioning from birth basically, to find the narcissist to be what makes "sense" to us.
Please keep an open mind; there is plenty of pain to be shared around; and as this is an ancient and very vexatious problem- these are the first true understandings and insights ever...
+SPARTANLIFECOACH the correct spelling is ACOANM RU4REAL for the Angela Maxwell is talking about. I haven't listened to her yet but here is a list of some of her vids: https://www.google.ca/search?q=angela+narcissistic+abuse+youtube&sourceid=ie7&rls=com.microsoft:en-CA:IE-Address&ie=&oe=&rlz=&gfe_rd=cr&ei=GQ6TVZWoO9DN3AGEw4H4Bw&gws_rd=ssl - ok I've watched a bit of her now and she is a survivor of narc abuse and tells her story for the purpose of warning and informing others. What she does is not in the arena of what you do therapeutically here, and as a specialist on the topic.As someone who was raised in a narcissistically abusive home I disagree with Maxwell - he may be hung up on semantics. We do invite the narc unconsciously, in the sense of allowing them in, and in the sense of being unconscious of what we are putting out to attract them - people pleasing behaviour for example. We very much do need to focus on changing that in ourselves - it's the only thing we can change, and nothing WILL change unless we do. My own experience is affirming this to me. Discovering what hoovering is for example, and realizing it's exactly what my mother and family do when I cut off from them, has eliminated my feelings of guilt at not complying, and feeling sorry for them thinking I have "hurt" them. My God, the bullshit that has baffled my brain.
A very articulate and prolific Narc survivor from Philadelphia who uses AONAM RU4REAL on Youtube.She grew up in a very toxic Narc famiy and then married a Narc; 'you marry your mother' hence the phenomen of generationa Narcs- which is a whole world of pain more than you talk about.That said; thankyou very much for your posts which have been very informative and of great comfort to me. I have escaped with my sanity and my ife largely intact after going No Contact 25+ years ago.The big question tha vexes me currently is 'how does one explain Narcissism to 99% of the world when it is so anthetical to every belief, paradigm and convention of mother nature herself? In short I am going to have to convince a Court
+fairyp k i have been trying the grey rock technique and it makes him more transparent to me if that makes sense
"Why is He Doing these Cruel Things?": Episode 68 of the "Ask a Question" Show
The cycle of a Narcissistic Relationship: //narcissistsupport.com/cycle-of-a-narcissistic-relationship/ In this episode Sasha asks, "Why is he being so hurtful to ...
+Cheese cake Thank you. Making these videos is just so rewarding, and I'm so glad that you are getting so much out of them. :) ...Sending some love right back at ya. <3
they do that dont they? they project their issues on to you... like they
may accuse u of having low self esteem or something to that effect - so by
saying all that crap to you they try and convince theirselves ur the
problem not them. When in reality they are deeply wounded...
well i can say one thing, if he has to keep doing that and you don't care - you hold the power - the person who cares least about the other person in the relationship holds the most power, and don't worry people around him will see him for what he really is, it might take them some time but reasonable and sane people wont want anything to do with him. It must be very challenging and difficult for you but im glad you are living the life you rightfully deserve <3
+alcudiababe1 Oh my gosh-YES! Thank God my narc left last August & since then, he has posted a lot of CRAP about me on social media & thinks everything I post is about him! I have had NO contact for 5 months, & he is such a COWARD that he talks about me on his youtube channel projecting everything onto me! I can see what a weirdo he really is now. He has tried to make me look bad to others, but it doesn't matter anymore because I have gone on with my life & am successful, while he is still a whiney loser. Anyone that would be around him for very long would eventually see him for what he really is.
+alcudiababe1 Yup. Big time. The projection is really wild once we are able to distance ourselves emotionally and watch the situation without believing what they are saying.
It reminds me of a little kid finding another playmate and taunting, "
we're having fun and you can't have as much fun as us.". I find it helpful
to think of the narcissist as the perpetual little tantruming , annoying
kid . It will make you chuckle at the absurdity of who they are. Just
chuckle at them, tell them" good , enjoy" and keep walking. That nonchalant
attitude really gets their goat, because they see they can't hurt you at
all.
If they've already caused you a lot of harm, then best to ignore them all
together.