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Touchless Society

We cant touch. we cant look. That is unhealthy... I am part of a team of researchers doing an ethnography of YouTube culture for a class at Kansas State ...

User Comments

mungojelly commented on 26 Jul 2013

The best cure to this disease is clear communication. Consider the great power of a "Free Hugs" sign-- it deeply alters these social rules in a magical liminal space invoked in its vicinity, just with that one clear expression. By inventing more such clear expressions we can open more such spaces. One of the best ways to tell whether someone wants to be touched is just to ask! "May I hug you?" "May I hold your hand?" By speaking clearly we can both respect people's space and open possibilities.

Keni Lynch commented on 20 Aug 2010

the study of proxemics is interesting...touch, body-space differences across cultures.. i'm living in spain where people kiss each other twice on the cheeks as a greeting... touch is not as aggressive even between males...greetings in letters often end with the words...'hugs' .... funny huh! a study was done across the world on which societies touch more and which less...the English touched least...basically never, i think it was one south american country that clocked 27 touches per hour..

kevinellerton commented on 25 Jun 2007

hey... thank you for this video. i love you in a totally inappropriate way ;-) have you dug into the Judeo-Christian roots of this? I'd be interested to hear your take on that. the only thing i disagree about is male-male touch... i see anthro thru evolution (i'm a physical anthropologist). touch btw babies and adults has an evolutionary purpose. females w/ males has an evolutionary purpose. males w/ males... not so much. males need to maintain boundaries against genetic competitors.

Opinionator52 commented on 01 Apr 2007

When I was younger men, while have having conversation may reach out and somewhat affectionately touch or take hold of the others arm or shoulder or arm. I think this behavior that was once common has become more like what you are saying. Now, hand holding, other than an affectionate hand shake is looked at more sexually as we mature. I do miss the time when most of the men I knew would have more contact while conversing... These days there seems to be litigation around every corner!

Chloe Supertaster commented on 24 Jun 2007

I totally agree. WHEN BABIES AREN'T TOUCHED THEY EXPERIENCE A HEARTBREAKING "FAILURE TO THRIVE," AND THEY DIE. I THINK THAT ADULTS EXPERIENCE FAILURE TO THRIVE ALSO; THEY DIE TOO--IT JUST TAKES A LOT LONGER. BUT IT IS STILL JUST AS SAD...DID you see the Iraqi orphans last week? These boys that were chained to their beds, and starving, because the aid (food and clothing) they had been "receiving" was being sold on the black market. It makes me sick...I agree. Let's hug someone today!!

PCS Entertainment commented on 05 Nov 2008

I wish our society wasn't so isolated as well. We travel in boxes (cars), like in boxes (houses), we ride up and down in boxes (elevators), I kinda wish society wasn't heading towards more isolation. Makes it harder to meet people. I study people all the time. See if a smile sent receives a smile back. It's nice when complete strangers smile back. Would be nice to just cuddle up on a couch watching a movie with a female friend without expectations of anything. (out of space)...

clyphox commented on 17 Aug 2007

will more questions and words help us out of this confusion Maybe there's something growing inside us which will reject all this confusion and we will learn to love strangers. Sadly for people to bond tightly (as I've observed) requires true trails and tribulations (and no NOT terror.. thats a concept foreign to people who are just barely able to eat daily) Just plain old hard times, thats when we learn to stand together like good penguins (IE: selfless self-preservation)

dogwood523 commented on 27 Nov 2008

Thank You Thepoasm...I understand what you are saying, and I agree, I am a very kinesthetic (touchy feely ) type of man...however in our society the "TOUCH" is not "Allowed" esp. for men... I LOve to hug children...non-sexually, of course...(notice the disclaimer...)but I had to wait until I was a grandfather for it to be more tolerated in regard to touch.....CIAO Of course there are those who would and do exploit touching...I am Strongly OPPOSED to that...

Mauricio Franco commented on 29 May 2010

I live in Colombia, here, the "touch culture" here is a lot more accepting, the thing is, I think, that people DO need their own personal space, because, if people are invading your space, your privacy, all the time, well... it doesn't leave you much space to define your own ways of interaction, you end up reacting on the actions of others, or, losing the regard you have for the touch itself, I know that last one certainly is the case here.

PsychologicalCynic commented on 19 Jan 2012

I have read up on multiple websites that adolescence who engage in touch with each other... Have a EXTREMELY lower chance of becoming criminals. But just like the top rated comment on this very video, people will not take it, you, me, science, psychology or anything that sounds funny seriously. My advice? Just laugh at them. Laugh while they suffer and don't know what they want in life. That's what i do, and it gets me on well enough.

Daniel Kreaps commented on 16 Sep 2013

I completely agree! in psychology we learn about all the GOOD things that come from touch! communication, love, reduces stress and anxiety. increases feelings of closeness. but with lack of touch it creates aggression and hostility. it leads people to think the only way the feel powerful is by violence, could be sexual, or killing people. Serial killers are mainly only found in the United States, and i think this is why.

PsychologicalCynic commented on 19 Jan 2012

Meh. That's our society, We (Americans) Hate each other. Say i'm wrong, but i can argue to the grave. We don't want to be around each other, we don't wanna look at each other, we just want to be alone. But when you look at it... We see any kind of touch as sexual, there is not comfort touch for guys. If a girl touches you, she wants your nuts, apart from that, she is a tease. That is how western society is.

BlacklitFloater commented on 26 Aug 2007

I also think it's sad how like it's seen as gross if even people in YOUR FAMILY kiss.. I mean, like I have a friend or two that are like "eww you'd kiss your dad on the cheek" and I kiss my mom on the cheek and give her a hug and I was raised that way. It's nice when people touch you out of love, and I do agree it would be better if people weren't so uptight about people touched every now and then.

Ashvin Vijayakumar commented on 25 Dec 2007

in hong kong, you can sleep on someone's shoulder in the subway - and its normal. (saw it in an ad) its a cultural thing. in india, guys and girls hold hands in any order w/o issue. its a cultural thing. anyway... ask urself what does it feel like watching these videos again so many months later?? if ur laughing, its good. if ur not... thats too bad.

kiahcoud commented on 14 Nov 2009

i just dont touch people cos i just hate people. i dont want to know them and i dont want to be with other people. i dont want to be or have someone be affectionate. whats the point?! as long as youre polite and nice why do you need to touch a person? good points, but i think you should consider the indidual other than just a society in general.

adderbrain5 commented on 02 Dec 2008

i lived in spain for a while and there people kiss on both cheeks whenever they meet even if they have never met before. People always touch when talking to eachother, people you dont know will pat you on the back etc. In spain americans are considered the least friendly/least open to physical contact even more so than northern europeans

Retrovertigo26 commented on 14 Apr 2007

Men are not supposed to feel emotions that get in the way of competitive and analytical thinking because they expose vulnerability, and lack of touching is an indicator of this. The result is that any emotion except competitive ones like aggression and cunning which "fill in" for the emotions exposing vulnerability) sort of die off.

jabba lewinsky commented on 02 Apr 2007

Isn't our phobia of touch a symptom of a larger societal problem. It's probably down to alienation and fear. So in order to acceot touch we'd have to organize some revolution or something. I'm free next week if you're interested, and i think my dad has a small arsenal of nuclear weapons stashed in his closet.

parispeter2 commented on 05 May 2007

I think this is very interesting. Of course there are always limits to touch in any society, but probably American society - but not only - is quite extreme here. Doesn't that tell us something about our relationship to our own bodies? I don't know, but it set me thinking! It's a whole research project!

Kyle Hoskins commented on 19 Apr 2007

I don't think the "man hug" is neccisarily unhealthy I just think aggrestion in its loose form is apart of a man's dna but when i hug my buddy josh with the "man hug" it is just as an intamate thing as when I hug my friend Lindsey just wired differently I suppose. but I agree with what your saying.

nonoctave commented on 04 Apr 2007

Good video. This has to do with English culture. Italy, Spain and the Middle East all allow men to touch much more. America and England don't. Studies of infants on this would be unethical, but it has been done on monkeys and no touch produces psychotic monkeys with irreversible brain damage.

tneshi commented on 16 Nov 2007

Touch me. I love watching people too. Most people react pretty awkward to me watching them. Every now and then somebody smiles. And I can live on that for days. Another thing I got thinking about while I watched is: do we enjoy listening to the thought of a stranger for 5m57s - offline?

thepoasm commented on 01 Apr 2007

Yeah, you can look at it that way. but toch isnt always sexual. in alot of other cultures its totally natural, in children too, i mean theyll crawl all over eachother. but i guess if we take your route, the children havent developed hormones....i dont know...it just blows my mind a bit

Tony Gem commented on 02 Apr 2007

This is a great topic theposam. I'm an affectionate guy so I've made an effort in my life to find other folks like me who aren't afraid of touching & hugging. It takes a while, but it's pretty amazing how great it feels to be around people who care about you, but also SHOW it. Thanx.

Sea Hawks commented on 02 Apr 2007

when i become very good friends with someone...i become a very touchy person. lol i can be percieved as gay by outsiders because i will usually give my other guy buddies a hug but not a gay hug..lol...well i guess it is a gay hug because people think im gay because of that...grrrr

MicroCorp commented on 22 Nov 2007

Guess what? You're dumb. Stop being really insightful and intelligent. Jesus! It's too much to take. EVER. Also, to this guy below me- get bent, go see a shrink, then jump off the roof of a fast moving car naked so you can get chees gratered by the asphalt. Just a suggestion.

swazzleberry commented on 13 Apr 2007

It bothers me too. I wish it were more acceptable... but at the same time, I get a little weirded out when people touch me too much. In high school, other girls would run up to me all the time and hug me and for some reason it really made me uncomfortable. I'm not sure why.

themaninnavyblue commented on 01 Apr 2007

yea i dunno how to say it? i tottaly agree/know what your saying... my old church used to make everyone hug and stuff and i got used to "touching" guys in that way, and when i would do it to my freinds at school they would always freak out and be like "what are you gay?"

thepoasm commented on 01 Apr 2007

do you ever have it when someone hugs you just two seconds too long? and its somewhat awkward? then you go to get out of the hug...they dont let go, so you have to re-hug another second or two...the rehugging is awkward for me, so i usually do the sway with that...

thepoasm commented on 01 Apr 2007

its goin, i actually just got through alot of lit reviews so this weekend is all youtube all the time. right now im trying to figure out what authenticity means on youtube...but we just presented at the Sapiens Symposium here at Kansas State. Thanks for asking!

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User Comments

Trillium commented on 01 Oct 2014

The symbol for Boron is B. That's a fail.

Andrew James commented on 01 Aug 2015

+Trillium True, but funny is funny

Same-sex couples marry in Lawrence

Less than 24 hours after the U.S. Supreme Court lifted the state's ban on same-sex marriage, couples are saying “I do,” in Lawrence.

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