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What irritates me most about this story is how they always give reply e-mails a new subject. Who does that in real life? It's a gross misrepresentation!

You've forgotten that Edward ISN'T replaceable because of his wealth. Forget the fact that he is an abusive asshole (You know, like Eel and her brain-dead fans did) and look at the rest. He is model-gorgeous, obsessed with Bella (pretend it's sweet, like the idiots do) and he's offered her hundreds of thousands of dollars in clothes, jewelry, a physical trainer, a car (later on), helicopter rides, etc. A lot of women still wish they could marry a rich man to dote on her, and this is that wish-fulfillment fantasy. Like Meyer, Eel just has to make Bella hate all that stuff because it isn't proper for us to ask for or expect extravagant gifts. So yeah, Mike, Jake or anyone else don't stand a chance with Bella. None of them are good-looking or rich enough.

I'd like to see a reasonably talented writer collaborate with Eel. Obviously, she would be kept away from the plot, dialogue, pacing, and so on, but be left in control of writing the villain. There is no character in recent memory that I've disliked with such genuine gusto as Edward/Christian Grey. Normally, I tend to admire artistic work, in whatever form that it may take, that goes against the trope where the villain is routinely defeated, but this is one of those cases where it would be SO satisfying to see the villain get his comeuppance. If that were the case, I'd ALMOST have to say that it made the entire book worth suffering through, but, that would be an overstatement, as Eel, as a writer, is garbage-tier. Tie this with the fact that I know that the misogynistic shitlord isn't going to get his skull viciously driven into concrete at the end makes this nearly unbearable.

Sweet Jesus. Just how many chapters are in this fic overall?